I support body positivity, but am still going to diet

I support body positivity, but am still going to diet

I have read a few fantastic posts recently from blogging friends about being comfortable in your own body and supporting the post-baby body change most of us women will go through. And I completely love how women are supporting each other and the scars from pregnancy. I love how we’re putting the middle finger up to society and saying, “You know what, I don’t care that I’m overweight or not a size 6 like the celebs are in the magazines”.

But do you know how I also feel? Fat and frumpy. Yep, I KNOW I should love my body, but I just don’t. I gave birth two and a half years ago and since then have put on two and a half stone. I’ve yo-yo dieted and eaten plenty of cake thinking “This is just me now, embrace it”. But when I look in the mirror, it makes me unhappy.

“No amount of body positivity could make me love my body at the moment. I’ve tried but I can’t.”

I suppose on the face of it, society has gotten to me and brainwashed me into the idea of how a woman “should be” and that baby weight (or any weight, in fact) is the devil and should be removed at the first opportunity. Maybe I’m not as pro-woman as I thought? Or maybe I just liked how I was before, being comfortable in my own skin and really feeling positive about my body.

I totally get why women are boycotting diets, wearing whatever they want and letting the “thigh gap” be something you get when you bend down to pick up kids toys off the floor. As of late, my eyes have really been opened, I’ve become a mini-feminist and very pro-woman, but I just can’t be happy with my reflection.

I wish I could love my shape, like so many women do, you are all amazing, but I will be popping back on the scales and counting my Weight Watchers points tonight, and will for some time. I just don’t feel happy in my own skin and I’m sorry, but there is nothing I can seem to do about it.

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