Supermarket shopper black list. Which are you?

Supermarket shopper black list. Which are you?

We all have to brave a trip to the supermarket at least once a week. I usually find myself there 2 or 3 times and now I’ve become accustomed to my “supermarket shopper black list” We all know, or are guilty, of being one of these. If you don’t recognise one, it’s probably you. What’s your shopping pet peeve? 

The slow coach.

This breed of shopper frequents the busiest aisles at the busiest times with no where to be any time soon. They like to slowly browse each aisle and stop with their trolley right in the centre whilst they gaze off into space. Usually accompanied with lots of people negotiating the agility course of the remainiing room with a toddler and a trolley. Lots of “excuse me’s” and “sorry’s” can be heard by the poor bystanders trying not to ram a whole crate of potatoes onto the floor.

The “I’ve got places to be and people to see” shopper.

This type can be found barging in front of trolleys and prams creating havoc with emergency stops and terrifying potential trolley collisions in their wake. They have no concept of the destruction they cause, but they are in and out in less than 5 minutes so all in all, it’s a win for them.

The “I have no clue what I’m doing” shopper.

Usually found grazing the self-service checkout with a terrified look in their eye and carrying a lone bread roll in a plastic bag.

The “Two seconds faster” shopper.

They can usually be found about two seconds ahead of you grabbing the last one of the item you ABSOLUTELY MUST HAVE off the shelf with a smug look on their face.

The “Too cool for school”-ers

Found during lunch time hours and after 3.00 this breed can be found binging on strawberry laces and full fat Coke pretending they are far too cool to be shopping in a supermarket. Also very often seen doing a mating dance to a member of the opposite sex involving giggles and a “blue steel” duck face.

The loiterers.

This is the most majestic of shopper. Very often found after 4pm loitering with intent around the discount section; waiting for the poor unsuspecting staff member to put the price down on the 15p loaf of bread. Can also be found knocking things on the floor hoping for a “whoops” price slash on that cream Victoria sponge.

Do you have any more to add to the list? I’m, of course, the exemplary shopper with no flaws at all (yes I’m sometimes a slow coach alright!).


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