A troubled pregnancy – When it isn’t all blooming marvelous!

So you’re pregnant. You’re overjoyed. You can already picture the walks in the park; feeding the ducks; first time at a beach; first day at school. Inside your belly, less than a millimeter in size is a lifetime of love, hope and expectation.

Many, if not most, travel through the following 40 weeks, give or take, with no problems. Maybe a little sickness, swollen ankles and a bit of backache. They paint their nursery and bring their bundle of 7lb 2oz home after a 24 hour stay in the hospital.

What about when this picture is as far from what you’re feeling as possible? You think why me? What else can possibly happen?

I have only a little to moan about, many more suffer a darn sight more than I have and will. But it is irrelevant of the quantity, frequency and severity when something happens to YOUR baby.

My husband and I had to go through the worst week of our lives when I needed an amniocentesis. Not knowing what the outcome would be, was our baby poorly; had I grown a baby with a problem; is it my fault? We were the luckiest parents in the world to find out little one was, chromasomally, fine. We felt like we’d won the lottery.

But what about when that result comes back and things aren’t ok. What about when you have to make unimaginable decisions about your pregnancy in the matter of a couple of days. The week before you were stroking your tummy and looking at bootees in the shops now you were talking to a consultant about a condition that has a long name that you don’t understand.

What about when you need to make a sacrifice to keep your health and pregnancy? Your body is making life difficult for you and your blood pressure is high; your placenta is in the wrong place; your blood tests aren’t right.

Your friends may not understand. They’ve never been in your shoes. Don’t blame them, they can’t help it. They’re trying their best.

It feels like shit. But don’t feel like you’re alone. There are a lot more of us than you think. Being stuck in a hospital can be very isolating. Making a decision about something so major can be terrifying. But you are never alone. Look for blogs; facebook groups; websites; forums; charities and your midwife. There is a whole world of support out there. Don’t let it go unused.

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